Uncle Tom

I know I have shared this information with many of my readers through other media, but in case you are one of those who did not, I wanted to post something here. My dad's brother Tom passed away at around 3:00 AM last Wednesday. He had been diagnosed with a brain tumor about two years ago, which was subsequently removed; unfortunately, the tumor returned in greater numbers recently, and had spread to various parts of his brain. These tumors had affected the language and personality centers, which caused difficulty speaking and understanding. I have been told that his last days were peaceful and without pain, and that is definitely something for which I am thankful.

Although during the last several years our families have not been close, we were very close when I was younger. Today I find that most of my familial communications are with my mom's family, but this was not the case when I was a child. We visited with my dad's family almost every week or every two weeks for family cookouts or meals of some kind. Plus there were occasional "reunion" type meetings; I can remember the most recent one (sad to say that 10 years ago was recent) was held in Gatlinburg, TN, in the beauty of the mountains. We always had a good time, and I always felt welcome and included.

My uncle Tom was always glad to have us over to the old house; he and his wife Carolyn took care of my mamaw and papaw in their last years. Though sometimes I felt out of place among all the adults (most of my cousins are several years older than I), Uncle Tom always made sure I was happy by giving me something to do or, with my parents' and Aunt Carolyn's permission, a little treat. I can remember very well how fascinated I was by the little M&M machine that they had, and always loved pulling the arm and getting some of those candies right in my hand! Of course, he warned me that candy is not to be eaten any time I wanted it, but when the times were right, we snacked away.

Over the years we also received special packages from Tom and Carolyn with decorations or toys for the holidays. Christmas and Halloween were the ones that I remember most vividly, and I was impressed because no one else had thought of anything like that. I looked forward to the goodies that we would get in the mail and it made the holidays that much better. In fact, I'm sure we still have some of those decorations stored away somewhere...hmm

Unfortunately over the years, our families drifted apart and we did not see each other or really communicate. Even though Uncle Tom was our closest family member in distance, we were probably the furthest apart in practice. We did send Christmas cards and other by-mail communication occasionally, and sometimes saw him around town. I can remember on several occasions, my brother Ryan saw him at antique car shows that came to our area. Uncle Tom loved antique cars, and attended these kinds of gatherings whenever he could.

I also found out only recently that he was very involved in charity work through his church. Although I did know that he was an active member of his church, I was not aware of his work with the Mission of Hope. This charity helps people who live in rural Appalachia by providing clothes, food, toys (usually at Christmas), and decent homes for the poorest of the poor in that area. It was all the more appropriate then that at his funeral, a passage from Matthew 25 was read; this is the passage that you may recall regarding "whatever you did for the least of my people, you also did unto Me." How appropriate indeed!

I was fortunate to be home for Easter break and able to attend his funeral. Since I was working, I didn't get the chance to meet with the family and friends at the receiving, but I did get the chance to pay my respects and talk with some of the family. I hadn't met with Aunt Carolyn or Tom's two daughters in many years, and I had the opportunity to meet with Carolyn and the younger daughter Erin and give my support. It was a sobering experience, but I was still glad to have been there.

Despite the fact that I have lost another family member, I am still reassured by the fact that he passed away so close to Easter. After all, Easter is all about life coming out of death! Jesus had to die to ensure eternal life for us all, and now my uncle Tom is experiencing that eternal life in Him. I know that is comforting to me as I try to understand just why things happen the way they do.

Uncle Tom, pray for us...