Wednesday, November 15, 2006

In Memory of Sharon

As many of you know, Sharon Selby passed away one year ago today. If you want, you can go back to my former posts a year ago and read all I had to say at that time:

Sharon Selby Part I - November 18, 2005

Sharon Selby Part II - November 21, 2005

I have been struggling with accepting her death for some time now, yet I think I am finally getting to that point of acceptance. It was especially hard considering I hadn't seen her in so long, plus she had been suffering so much up to her death. I had been communicating with her via e-mail just a month or so before her passing, and yet, I didn't even see what was right in front of my face. Of course, hindsight is 20/20, so now as I read that final e-mail she sent only days before her passing, I can see what I had missed back then. At first I felt guilty, but eventually this turned into anger and sadness.

One year later, I think I am finally getting to that point of acceptance. It has not been an easy "journey" but it is happening. It has taken a lot of prayer and meditation, which, ironically enough, were things Sharon took heavy stock in. I finally came to the conclusion that there was nothing I could do, so guilt was not necessary. I should not be angry or sad, but joyful. Sharon has been freed of her pain and suffering on Earth and received her reward (hopefully) in Heaven. It is kind of odd that this has taken me so long to accept this, but I'm glad I finally am. I have realized that all I can do is "let go and let God" as they say, and that's what I have been doing. I just got back from Mass and lighting a candle in the Church for Sharon. Prayer really works!

Well, that's really all I have to say today. I'm sorry to vent all my feelings into this blog, but that just so happens to be my outlet. Let us thank God for the gift of Sharon in our lives, and ask Him to watch over her now and forever. Let us also ask Sharon to intercede for us and watch over us. We miss you and we hope to see you again in Heaven.

3 comments:

Tim B. said...

Reminds me of a line from a poem I recently read...

Forward. Somewhere out there the world must have an end.
(O Appius Pappius)

:-D

Knew you'd get a kick out of that!!

Anonymous said...

I felt the same way for 3 years, losing a daughter. Wonder how it struck you when hearing about your aunt Colleen suffering and dieing. Just thought I'd ask.

Sean M. said...

Well, I felt the very same way when all that was going on, and for the very same reasons. I hadn't seen her in a very long time, and it was hard to know she was suffering and there was nothing I could do about it. I prayed about that for a very long time, but came to the same conclusion (funny how I don't learn these things from my experiences). I had to accept that it was God's Will, and that there was nothing I could do to stop it. I accepted that, and accepted that she was in a better place free of pain. It took me a long time to get past that and realize that, but it's good that I did. Not that I don't want to remember her; just that I don't have to feel sad or angry or guilty anymore. I hope you have reached that point in your life, too, hard as it may be.